Don't need any wipes...

Cause I ain't done shit. (Somehow that seemed clever in my head, but if its enough to get me rolling, I'll take it) But really,Ive been abnormally lazy these last few weeks. Jules 3rd birthday and Christmas or Krismas or Yule or Mega-Mega-Present Day (we'e having a bit of an identity crisis) went great, then we all got sick...and were dumped on by old man winter. It was the perfect storm to create a wave of lazy that I am just now fighting my way out of.

Of course I have a ton of things to be doing (as if that ever changes), but Blair is conked out on me right now, so why not blog?

First, the kiddos: Jules and Blair are both huge. Blair at 6 months is roughly the size of a 1o month old, and Jules is measuring at the height of a nearly 4 year old! Plus they are pretty great together.

I'm still trudging through grad school for... some reason. It certainly has led me to decide that while I do enjoy my job (what I do every day in the classroom)
but I cannot stand my career (all this extra shit). I've rally got to strt pushing to be a stay at home dad.

Doing more stand-up this week. Basically the same set, just going to try and rework it a bit, strengthen the delivery, not suck, etc. This too is a source of some anxiety but also some "oomph" to get me off my ass and start producing.

To assist with said production of, well, anything and everything really, I'm going to blow Jess' savings on a smartphone...and a replacement wedding band. Yep, I'm "that guy" in yet another way. I have no clue where it went or how I lost it, but it is gone. Sadness and shame abound (mostly shame).

So if you follow me here or on twitter or facebook (all 5 of you) then you can look forward to me pummeling you with useless crap more often once I gets me into the new millennia with one of them phones. And hopefully that will also lead to some quality work as well, which is my real hope.

This little light of mine

Shakespeare told us that conscience makes cowards of us all -- fear of what comes after death makes us stay and suffer those oft-mentioned slings and arrows of life.

Joel does not know that fear. He has dreamt in the warmth of the womb and moved on to dream the dreams that we can never share.


I found this, today, in a notebook I tried to keep all sorts of thoughts in, particularly those occurring in the days and weeks immediately following Joel's death.

Originally, it was the notebook I used to try and brainstorm jokes and bits for that pipe dream day where I try and do stand-up. Honestly, the material was pretty crappy.

But I made a promise to... the air, I made a promise that I would try and be more productive in my life; that I would do stuff. And that is what lead me back to that notebook tonight, and to my own words -- well, my theft of and blending with Shakespeare's words (but what does his dead ass care?)-- my words that gave me some level of comfort. I went back to look at those unfortunately useless jokes because I'm going to do something.

I will fail. This is practically guaranteed. But I've got promises to keep.


On October 15th, I'll be shining a light for Joel and all the other babies that never got a chance to dodge those slings and arrows. I hope you will join us, and if you have a baby you had to say goodbye to too soon, I will be thinking of you, whether we know each other or not.



A few days later, I'll try this thing I'm talking about. I'll let you know how it goes.

month

Yes, I'm still alive. Wish I could say I've been too busy for a post, but that wouldn't be entirely true (although I could make up the excuse). I suppose, if anything, I've been distracted.

While I'd never really say that my mind is 'occupied', it certainly tends to be pre-occupied with what often seem to be unimportant, or at least un-help-able, items.

Unfortunately its really not all that interesting. Least not for a blog. Who wants to read a rant about tax dollars and the education system that, in the end, would really only prove how little I know about the inner-workings of the system that pays my bills? (Clearly these people know what they are doing, right? I mean, they are the EDUCATION system...and part of the government! So they MUST know what is best.)

Now one interesting and not-mad-at-the-world item thats been on my ming is the young Mr. Blair Culver (had I mentioned that? Blair Owen, to be exact. more names that will probably make my family cringe

So far things have been looking pretty good for our newest boy. Even had an echo-cardiogram the other day and got the all clear on heart issues (ordered for two reasons: my sister was born with a heart defect *insert joke* and there are some kidney issues related to heart defects)

He has also been referred to as "wild" which I would certainly agree with . The kid moves a whole lot more than Jules or Joel ever did during their ultrasounds. We may be in for some trouble when this guy comes home.

I still have plans for 'Ask a DB dad', particularly on the religious front like I had teased. Well, its not religious advice, persay, more like 'how to deal with religious stuff' because, to put it simply, just because a Bible quote applies to a situation, it doesn't mean it is automatically comforting. But- but.. it's from THE BIBLE?! Yes, Virginia, but so is the edict not to eat that bacon sandwich you're chowing down on -- we'll talk about this later.

As for now I must go work on this 'grad school' stuff and, apparently, figure out what I "officially" plan to do with my life. I'm being told that making smartass comments, reading comics, thinking about comics and cleaning up poop does not count as a "life plan". Feel free to make suggestions.